Fishy Dog!

Can anyone tell me why dogs like to roll around in things that stink?  I mean they drool over themselves when you put a steak in front of their face.....so they must know what "good" things smell like......so why MUST they roll in things that literally makes you gag????  Like poop, dead animals, garbage, or fish guts?
Belle the Wonder Dog used her "wonder" nose the other morning to sniff out some rank fish guts that had been left behind after someone cleaned a mess of fish down by the water.  I think I've mentioned before that my parents live on a lake so fish guts are not out of the question to find..or smell around.  I'll spare you all the photo and let your imagination take over!
I walked out the other morning to find her rolling on her back so hard and she looked to be in DOG HEAVEN...she was gettin' it DONE!  I've never seen that dog move like that...I mean HEA....VEN!  Head moving one way...body moving the other and paws straight up in the air!
Knowing that of course it was something stinky, I told her to come praying that it wasn't something too stinky!  However, I wasn't so lucky and when she came into smelling range I was knocked over with the stench of ROTTEN FISH GUTS!  YEA FOR ME : /
Somehow it never fails that she does something like this to create more work for me when Jesse is MIA! I mean, why can't she roll in duck poop while their hunting or find a fresh turd when he is home....nope always when he's gone leaving the work to me!
I took her outside and hosed her off and then noticed that it didn't help.  So I decided to take the easy way out and throw bumpers to her over and over in the water praying that each time would wash the smell away more and more.  It was almost as bad as trying to get skunk off (and yes, we have had that pleasure as well)....impossible!
The next morning I let the dog out again only to repeat the entire process....angry does not describe my temperament.....who wants to wash a BIG dog two days in a row....in the cold mind you?  This time I pulled the dawn dish soap out and scrubbed and scrubbed and scrubbed her down then sprayed her with the ice cold hose water...serves her right....STILL didn't make a dent in the smell though!
When Jesse arrived back from his hunting trip he was greeted at the door with his beloved dog and "the smell".  Immediately he was taken back and gaged a little asking what in the world she got into!  I explained what I had battled over the past two days and even got a chuckle out of him when  I told him that I even sprayed her down with Febreze (YES MAM, you better believe it!)....which didn't work either.

Later I guess the smell had gotten the best of him because I found him in the bathroom with Belle in the tub scrubbing her down again.  I told him I could still smell her and he said he had already washed her twice.  So on NEW YEAR'S DAY we made the 6 hour trip back home with a very fishy smelling dog in the back of the car....FUN! 
What a fantastic way to welcome the NEW YEAR OF 2011!

Is this just a glimpse of what's to come??????  The start of a brand new year?????  Lucky me!

Belle....The Hunting Dog???

I have had a dilemma from the day that Belle arrived at our house.  I have never owned a big dog before so my knowledge is limited on the demands big dogs make on a person.....and a house. 

The hardwoods of this house were a huge selling point to Jesse and I when we bought this house.  They were beautiful and shiny....and who doesn't like shiny!  We have now lived here for 4 1/2 years and well...the shine started to fade quickly after the Red's pushed and shoved their toy cars over it and.....dumped stuff on it.  However, they were still in pretty good shape.  That was until Belle arrived. 
Here's the dilemma.....BIG DOG + BIG DOG NAILS = RUINED HARDWOODS!  She has scratched them to pieces and try as I might to keep her nails trimmed....she still scratches them! I am not talking about the kind of scratches you just buff out.....nope, I'm talking about the kind you spend a few grand on getting the floors refinished.

 I was joking with a friend of mine the other day and I said "wouldn't it be nice if they made some kind of plastic cap to go over dogs nails?".  She agreed and we went on exploring the various things we could cover the nails with......laughing of course...a lot (we got a little carried away).
 A few days later I hauled Belle and Gus off to the vet to get groomed and overheard the receptionist talking with someone about none other than nail caps for dogs.  I thought for sure I had just been sent a message from the Lord himself!  So I ease dropped a little more and found out where to purchase these bad boys.
Later that day I found myself at the pet store asking about these nail caps for dogs only to be looked at like I was an idiot.  Finally, the sales manager came over and pointed me in the direction of the cat aisle.  He explained that they didn't make them for dogs...just cats.  BUMMER!
On the drive home I couldn't help but wonder if some crazy person out there like me....with the same dilemma as me...had in fact made nail caps for dogs.  You all know that there are ALL kinds of crazies out there when it comes to pets (I use to be one until I had kids, I can't begin to count the many outfits I bought for pour Gus...he even had his own jammies...sad but true).
When I arrived home I jumped on the computer to do my research and wouldn't you know that there is a product out there to solve my dilemma!  So I ordered them......
They arrived yesterday and this is the finished product:

They are soft plastic nail caps that you glue on...like a fake finger nail!!!! I LOVE IT....because it made me laugh...and they work!  Please keep in mind that this is Jesse's hunting dog : )  I couldn't resist....I had to get pink! Every girl needs to be a little DIVA every now and then!
I just can imagine Jesse out there in the marsh, knee deep in camo...with Belle to his side with her flaming HOT PINK TOES!!!  See...doesn't that make you smile too!
 

Belle The Glow Dog

 I have been a pretty supportive wife with the whole hunting thing.  I was even supportive when Jesse wanted to get a retriever to help with his duck hunts.  When he brought Belle home she fit right in.  The Red's love her, Sissy Lou dominates her and Gus is lost without her.  She has been a great dog and a great addition to our family.  She is very well trained and hasn't given us much trouble at all....except for the past TWO WEEKS!  Something clicked inside her tiny brain and she has decided to make up for her good behavior the past year all at once.

It all started when Jesse returned from his North Dakota hunting trip.  I am assuming that somewhere out in the middle on no where that Belle lost her mind.  Maybe she was overwhelmed with how many ducks she had to retrieve, or maybe she froze to death in the State that is minutes from Canada....your guess is as good as mine.  One things for sure...she came back a different dog. 

It started out with a pair of Jesse dress shoes (that are not cheap).  We just chucked it up to her missing him since they had been together for every waking hour the past ten days.  Then she moved on to whatever toy was lying around the house.  She would take it to her kennel and chew it to pieces.  Then it was my house shoes (which I adore and can't live without.....I even go to car pool in them....yes I know you are laughing, but they are the best!) needless to say I was not a HAPPY!

Then she would run down the road to visit everyone every time I let her out.  Then she chewed one of my Euro shams that goes on our bed (at this point I am growing a hatred toward this dog). 

Not to mention the countless times she has rolled in poop....all in TWO WEEKS...she has had at least 3 baths. Then she did something that I would have never guess she would chew...THE COUCH (now I'm ready to look for a new home for Belle The Wonder Dog).

But two days ago she chewed something that just made me laugh.

On Halloween the kids all had glow stick bracelets so we could keep up with them (not that it helped).  Since then I have been finding them all over the house and then throw them away.  Apparently I missed one and Belle found it.  I was sitting here the other day and all of a sudden I see Belle started bucking like a wild horse.  She is jumping, bouncing and shaking her head.  Then I notice that she is foaming at the mouth something fierce!  She was drooling puddles on my floor and looked to be agitated with the whole thing. I walked over to her kennel to see what she had gotten into and found....a glow stick bracelet.  She had been chewing on the end and punctured it. 

No worries people she didn't shallow enough of it to hurt her and the vet said she would be just fine.  But it did make me laugh that she finally got HERS!  That will teach you Belle...SO Stay away from my pillows, my couch and for goodness sakes my HOUSE SHOES!

The Fence Dilemma

Most of you know by now that my husband is an avid hunter.  He hunts anything that is in season, but his main love is duck hunting.  For that reason he bought a Labrador last year for retrieving ducks/geese and doves.  We named her Belle the Wonder Dog and she loves...LOVES to retrieve!

This past year Jesse spent countless hours training Belle and she has done quite well with her training.  This is her first hunting season to try out her skills so we were all nail biting the first hunt.  You never know how a dog will do with live birds and not just decoys or bumpers.

  Last weekend was opening season for Dove and Jesse thought this was perfect for Belle's first hunt.  The first day she did alright, but still quite hadn't figured out that whole live hunt thing.  The second day she lived up to her name....Wonder Dog...Jesse was so proud and was beaming when he came home.  He said everyone was just bragging on how awesome Belle was.  The only problem she had that day was with.....a fence.  Yep, a fence, the kind that have the wooden slats:

 When a bird would fall on the opposite side of the fence Belle would burn over there just to hit the brakes when she came to this fence.  She couldn't for the life of her figure out how to get over the fence.  Jesse being the "dog whisperer" decided that the best way for Belle to learn is to show her.  So Jesse (big body) walks over to the fence and proceeds to get down on his belly and slide himself under the fence.  He said there was plenty of room from the bottom slat to the ground.  He slid as far under to his waist and when Belle saw what he was doing she shimmied right under next to him and retrieved the bird from the other side.  She then went right back under the fence with the bird and sat down next to Jesse who was still under the fence half way. 

You know, some people have problems with calculations.  Like calculating the width under a fence, or calculating your body mass to said fence.  As he tried to slide backwards he realized something.....he was STUCK...oh yea, he couldn't move forward and he couldn't move backward...STUCK REAL GOOD!  His buddies were no help because they were on the ground snot laughing (as I would have been at this sight).  Jesse got tickled himself and was laughing so hard he couldn't move.  So there he was lying face down under the fence with his buddies standing around saying "Fat boy stuck in the fence"........I don't care who you are...that's funny people!  Finally after gaining his composure, and with some help, he managed to unwedge himself and slide out.  I wish, I wish, I wish I was there with the video camera that day.  Why is it that I always miss the good moments?

Thing 1 and Thing 2

A few weeks ago we headed down to Alabama for the Beasley family reunion.  My mom and dad were hosting this year so we decided we would go down a week before and help get everything ready.  The basement of mom and dad's house wasn't finished and they had been working tirelessly on it for a while to get it ready for this weekend.  The week was dedicated to work as Jesse tiled, Stephen (my brother) did the bathrooms among countless others, I painted, Dad worked on the ceilings and getting the doors in and mom watched the kids and cleaned.  We also had some help with friends and family as well.  To say there was a big job ahead of us was an understatement.

You have to understand that my father is a rather particular perfectionist and he only bought the nicest quality material.  I am talking about granite tile for the floor (super hard to cut and lay), ornamented ceiling tiles that had to be cut a certain way and the nicest carpet.  Work was slow, tedious, and frustrating!  The carpet was going to be laid on Wednesday so everything needed to be painted and cleaned beforehand.  Dad had finished the ceiling tiles in one of the bedrooms so I got busy painting in there.  The Red's had managed to wonder downstairs and were now at my feet begging to paint.  I think we all know how disastrous that would have been so I said no and shooed them off.  What I didn't know is while I was on the latter busy painting the Reds has snuck in and stole a few of my brushes. 

Later that night while we were cleaning out the kitchen area, I noticed a smell of Clorox.  I asked mom if she had cleaned anything down there and she said no.  It was then that I looked down and noticed two paint brushes on the floor next to a Clorox spray bottle.  Then fear...panic......as I looked at the wall and see that my boys (the Red's) had sprayed the Clorox and then painted with it with the brushes.  Streaks of Clorox ran down the wall.  I quickly washed it off and saw there was no damage, but scolded the reds and sent them back upstairs.

The next day the reds escaped again to the basement and locked themselves in the bedroom that I had painted and where the ceiling was now complete.  Somewhere around the house they had located a ball and proceeded throwing it all around and ended up knocking one of the ceiling tiles out.......something else to be fixed.

One of the doors wasn't put in completely so they also managed to knock the door frame loose when they slammed the door.....yet another thing on the list of to do's.

Again, they were scolded and sent upstairs.

The carpet people came and installed the carpet and the cleaning process began.  Everything needed to be put into place.  Beds needed to be put together and made, shower curtains installed, you name it......the works!  We looked like busy little bees and swamped with work.  Jesse jumped on the weed eater and dad  was busy with finishing touches.  The night before the tile had been grouted and a bucket of water that was used to wash the tile now sat in the garage.  The bucket full of dirty water drew my kids in like a magnet and before we knew it Andrew had dumped the whole bucket out in the garage.  So he was handed a mop and told to clean it up.....scolded again and sent upstairs.

Finally everything was ready and we were getting ready to relax.....until.........

We looked down and saw a few drops of blood on dads brand new expensive carpet....WHAT!?!?!?!?!?!?!  I looked at Jesse and he looked at me and then we both looked down at Belle......yep.......in heat 3 months early.  What luck...........

I think we might have done more harm than good.

Oh did I forget to mention that Jesse dropped a pair of pliers on the granite and took a nice piece out of one of the tiles : )

Poor Gus!

The other day I had to take the dogs to the vet. It was Belle's first visit and Gus had to get his teeth looked at. You see over the years Gus's teeth and breath have become horrendous that you couldn't hardly stand the smell. His breath smelled like garbage and his teeth were so loose that his tongue would always stick out of his mouth. So not being able to stand his breath any longer we decided the vet needed to take a look.

The news on Gus's mouth was not so great. They said that dachshund's are known for loosing their teeth and that Gus's teeth were so loose that they needed to extract 4-6 of them. They had become so loose that they were starting to decay and that was what the smell was....GROSS! So with that we made the appointment and took him this morning for his procedure. I got a call this afternoon that Gus was ready for pick up and with that I loaded everyone up and away we went to get poor Gus. When I arrived the vet stepped in to talk about what they had done. Everything went well except for they had to extract 9 teeth! POOR GUS, POOR TOOTHLESS GUS! So now we have Belle "the wonder dog" and Gus "the toothless wonder"!

Belle decided to help Gus out with some food and went into the kitchen. I heard some strange noises coming from there so I called her name. When she came to me I noticed her smacking her lips....and with that I jumped up, ran to the kitchen and saw the damage! Belle "the wonder dog" had lifted her 50 lb self up on the cabinet and had eaten 7....yes 7 cupcakes that I had made for the kids. She ate the cupcakes and the paper wrappers as well. I'm glad I caught her before she finished them all off!  I'm guessing it won't be  a good night for Belle and she will be spending a lot of time outside!

Pizza! Pizza!

The other night I had a function at church so I left Jesse in charge of all three kids.  I think I know that whenever this happens I always get a story for my blog!  So just to make life easy Jesse ordered pizza for supper.  When the pizza was delivered, Jesse put it on the table and went down stairs to gather the boys up.  When he returned upstairs he looked at the table and saw that the pizza was missing.  He then saw that Belle had drug the pizza box off the table.....opened the box and was getting ready to devour it!

The next day Jesse took the boys to T-ball practice and so I jumped in the shower while Payton was napping.  When I got out of the shower I notice something black that Belle had in her mouth.  It was Jesse's dress shoe and this was the second pair she has chewed.  I bet he is really starting the second guess his decision to get a puppy now!  All I have to say is, if she chews just one of my shoes there's going to be some T.R.O.U.B.L.E.!

Dominance

Dogs....dogs like to show their dominance to each other in many ways. Sometimes they do obscene things to each other, other times the fight, but one way in particular they show their dominance is by marking their territory. By this, I mean they pee all over to say that "this here is my land and don't you dare consider trespassing!". So for the past four days this is what we have encountered in our house hold. Gus who has been with us since we got married (10 yrs) has his bed in our room. It is rather large for his dachshund size, but he loves it. He also has a blanket on top of his bed that he wraps himself up in every night. Belle on the other hand is kennel trained, so we keep her in her kennel at night. She also has a bed in her kennel, but it is placed in the other room. Apparently Belle got a little jealous, like a lot of us women do. So to prove her dominance over Gus and show him she was in charge she walked over and peed right square in the middle of his bed. I didn't know what was going on, but Gus was walking around his bed in circles whining and then would stare down at it as if to say "are you kidding me!". So I got out of bed and pulled back his covers only to find a big puddle of pee! At first I thought it was an accident and put her outside immediately.......until the next day rolled around and she did the very same thing....AGAIN! So I pulled the cover off the big dog bed and his blanket and washed them for a second day in a row. Third and fourth day same thing.......but on the 4th day I caught her and sent her jealous rear end out the door.....then I made the boys pee on her bed.....okay I'm lying they didn't do that, but I wanted revenge for my beloved wiener dog!

The Heat is On!

SSSOOO......we bought this dog....a female...10 months old, and the trainer says to Jesse, "I think she will come into heat soon". Jesse hears, "whah waa whhaah whaa".......then we come home for two weeks and the dog starts acting all weird..really weird. The dog will not perform all her magical tricks for Jesse. The dog will not retrieve the golden goose for Jesse. The dog will do nothing but heel and sit or lay. The Master "Jesse" is getting really upset and angry that dog will not perform.....so Master huffs and puffs and wants to give the dog back. Forget the attachment and relationship that has formed with the other "mini" masters......nope, the dog is broken and must go back. But Sarge (Head Master) notices that dog isn't feeling well, in fact Sarge notices that dog looks to be in heat. When Sarge checks dog she sees that dog is for sure in heat. There is a reason why they gave female dogs a certain name...because when they are in heat they sure are hormonal!

So Sarge has prepared for such a day. Women must stick together regardless of the mammal. Sarge gets the dog diaper that was purchased earlier (because Sarge is always prepared and listened to the trainer). Then Sarge puts the diaper or over sized maxi pad on dog (since she is inside, we must protect our house)! Then Master and mini masters roll on the floor laughing at dog and mini masters start calling dog "diaper head". And they want to know why "diaper head" is bleeding out of her pee-pee and when "diaper head" will stop being hurt. Sarge left that conversation up to Master.

Doggone Dog

As you may have heard, we have added a new member to our family....Belle the retriever. Belle is a 10 mth old chocolate lab who has been in training for duck hunting most of her life. Jesse is so excited to have her and to be training her himself. She is very obedient and very loving, but she hasn't been around people, kids, cars, houses, or anything except other labs in kennels training. So needless to say she is not house trained. However, she has done an amazing job picking this up. She only had one accident since we've had her home and it's been over a week. This brings me to my story......not so much about accidents....well you'll see.....


Yesterday when we arrived home from school I took Belle out for her walk. I had all 3 kids outside letting them play with her as well. Andrew went in and changed out of his school clothes and returned with shorts, t-shirt with a jacket, and tennis shoes with no socks. May I remind everyone that it is still freezing cold and we still have a foot of snow on the ground. I told him he would get cold, but he didn't agree. Anyways, here they all go running around, shoes getting soaked, toes getting frozen and Belle using the bathroom....all is good......except.....Andrew decides he wants to sled. I again tell him this is a bad idea, he doesn't have any snow clothes on.....again he disagrees. Sometimes lessons are better learned lived. So off he goes down the hill and Belle chasing after him. Meanwhile, I am standing on the driveway with my nice shoes on holding Payton and talking with Eli. Andrew is yelling "whooo HHOOO" this is so much fun. He returns and starts down again. This is when I mention, "if you go down in the same spot you will go much faster". So off he goes again in the same spot, Belle chasing after and Andrew yelling again. This time he looks like a pro, smooth sledding and I have to say I was a little impressed...until....he ran out of room and didn't fall off the sled. So I begin yelling, "fall off, fall off", nope he didn't "fall off", he went right into the woods and down to the creek. When he stopped, Belle was right on top of him, and Andrew was now yelling...screaming...crying!!

Well, my snow shoes were inside and I couldn't carry Payton down the hill and then carry Andrew back up, so I told him I would be right there and went in to put Payton down and get my shoes. When I made it down the hill I see he is just fine, just a little scratched from the branches and he calms down. This is when I look over and see Belle rolling in something...digging through the snow and rolling again! And with that, Andrew says "WHEW....something stinks". It is at this point that I see that Belle, my well trained dog, is rolling in poop! You know, snow is beautiful, but it sure does keep everything FRESH! I start yelling commands to Belle and you know what...she didn't listen....just rolling, rolling, rolling in poop! I grab her collar and grab the sled and grab Andrew and up we all go (poop and all) up the steep hill. The next challenge was getting the stupid, yes stupid, dog in the shower. Thank goodness we bought this house for the shower! We like to call it the cow shower, because it's big enough to fit a cow in....or a poop dog! Three attempts to get her in the shower and finally I had Andrew hold the shower door closed and I got in with my clothes and washed the stupid dog that doesn't listen to commands! And you know what else....Labs are a lot bigger than wiener dogs and are a lot harder to wash. It took a whole bottle of shampoo and by the time it was all over I was drenched and Belle was clean, hair was all over my shower and it took 3 towels to dry her off.

Now what possessed us to get a dog....oh that's right....Jesse, and where was Jesse....work!