Rantings of a Mad Woman

Last night I had rehearsal at church so I was not at home and left the care of our children in the hands of my wonderful husband.  When I arrived home all kids were tucked snugly into bed and I was so happy!  I just happened to notice on my way to the bedroom that the middle cushion on the couch was pulled off and leaning against the couch.  As I came closer I could see a huge wet area all over the cushion.  So I asked, "honey, what happened?".  Jesse said that Payton had dumped her bottle out on the couch and he didn't know what to do with the cushion.  So this morning I pulled the cushion cover off (which is not easy by the way) and threw it in the wash.  We all jumped in the car to take Andrew to school and when we returned I pulled Payton from her car seat only to find out that her diaper did not do it's job!  There was poop all over her and her seat.  So I spent the next 30 minutes unhooking the car seat, pulling the straps off and pulling the cushion off of it......and into the wash it went along with outfit #1.  It was about time to feed Payton again so I put her in her bouncy with her bottle.  A few minutes later she was out of her bouncy and had joined me in the kitchen.  She immediately got busy dumping the dog's water out all over the floor and dragging her body through it.  So #1 towel to dry her and the floor and #2 outfit off .....into the wash.  I walked into the living room and noticed something dripping from Payton's bouncy seat......it was her bottle, turned upside down and leaking through the cushion and dripping on the rug.....my nice rug!  So I unhooked and pulled off that cushion and used #2 towel to soak up the milk out of the rug and into the wash they went!
I had received an important phone call so I let Eli play with his pixo's while I took care of some business.  For those of you who do not know what pixo's are.....be happy...be very happy!  They are tiny little balls that you can glue together with water and make pictures out of and solely created to make parent's miserable!  When I finished with my stuff I walked into the kitchen to find Eli sitting at the table with a glass full of water and all of his pixo's floating in a bowl......plus all the water he had managed to spill on the table and floor. Towel #3 full of water and pixo's....into the wash!  Since I had the cushion cover pulled off the cushion still I had left the cushion off the couch.  So the middle section was much lower and easy for Miss. P to climb up onto the couch.  After a few times of pulling her off I thought she would stay away....wrong!  I was in the kitchen getting Eli's lunch ready and I come to the couch to tell him it's ready and I find Payton on the couch drinking Eli's tea......It was in a cup and he had it on the end table beside the couch and she decided she wanted it.  Except, she didn't end up drinking it...she just ended up wearing it and covering another cushion in a liquid!  So couch cushion #2 and outfit #3 into the wash!  When I went to transfer the wash load to the dryer I find pez candy that someone had left in their pocket now all over the clothes that were washed....now into the wash to rewash....geez.
I wished I could say it all ends there...but while I was sitting here typing I hear a loud crash with something spilling on the floor.....I go to the kitchen and Eli has climbed up the shelves in the pantry and pulled down the storage container of (Costco sized) pretzels and they are now all over my floor.  Can you guess what Payton was doing?  She was not eating pretzels...she was in the boys room pulling their underwear out of their drawer!
Hopefully this day will end soon and I can get the 3 loads of laundry I have washed today folded and put away for the next attack....tomorrow!
By the way, Jesse came home and took Belle to the pond to train.  When he returned the first words out of his mouth were: "Hey honey, can you get me a towel"..........